I am not inclined to the usual pastimes like watching movies or hanging out with friends.
I prefer to spend my free time along to think and reflect.
It allows me to bond with nature and better appreciate things around me.
Besides, like what one of the Savage Garden songs says "I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone".
But I wasn't like this before; it was more like a personal discovery and realisation.
Like any other teenagers I was also hooked in parties, shopping, bars, and whatnot.
For years it has been my life - filled with booze, money, pick and mix sweets, foods, fashion, cars, and all the things you didn't need but definitely want.
During those times I have hurt a lot of people, my friends, lovers, and especially my family.
I was way out and beyond everyone's control.
I was rebellious.
Regardless of my attitude I never felt I was hated.
No matter what I do people are still there for me.
That's when it hit me - I have to change.
Change is anything but easy; nonetheless, I have had to.
Little by little I began to cut off my unnecessary expenses and spending.
I started not to go with my usual friends and their party marathons.
I have let go of the fads and glamour my able parents provided me.
At one point, I left my car at home and decided to walk around the city.
It was a cool sunny day - perfect for walking around.
It was only then that I have had the time to observe people and places around me while enjoying some pick and mix sweets.
I have seen a lot, heard a lot, and observed a lot of happenings, people, places, and sounds while walking around the city - alone.
It has given the opportunity to appreciate what my parents have given me as I see people on the streets with less of the things that I own.
I couldn't bear myself to swallow another pick and mix sweets as I see hungry children playing by.
Weird thing is they still have smiles on their faces despite of what fate had brought them.
I never noticed that I have been walking around the city for almost four hours with the pick and mix sweets on my hands.
The wind on my face opened my eyes to the reality of the world, to the big divide that separates people of different status in the society.
Moreover, it opened my eyes to the fact that there is still happiness even in the littlest and simplest of things and maybe even in their most painful.